Feedback

As my site has been up for some time now, I have received many e-mails commenting on the site. By far, the majority of these e-mails are positive and complimentary. If, for some reason, you want to read people praising me for my great contribution to the world community, click here for the positive feedback page. But, while many sites will use their feedback page only as a sort-of "showcase" of how much people like their sites, I think that the negative e-mails I have received often are far more entertaining. Particularly, it is amazing to me that some people have so much extra time on their hands that they will actually sit down and rip on a site as benign as a listing of famous gravesites. Oh, well. At least it gives me some good laughs!

Note: All of these e-mails are presented unedited (unless comments were unrelated to the feedback or if they used profanity), because some of the funniest things are how people typed things even more than what they typed. Also, I promise that I did not make these up! They are actual e-mails that I have received from people (I'm not nearly creative enough to fake these!).

"I'm sure you have no idea of life beyond your very small world. I'm sorry for you."

"if you're going to do a site like this at least make some attempt to learn something about the people whom you are photographing their graves. nice pictures, but you sound like a total idiot. this site is no findagrave, you should take some pointers from them."

"Decent website, although personal comments are not needed ...eg, comment about pennsylvania and countless others. your approach is like that of a ten year old."

"Hello. How old are you? Your comments are showing ignorance and are offensive....Please take out your comments because you portrait it American as an ignorant and self sentered group. I am not trying to offend you, I understand that this self centered culture is to blame for the ignorance of people. So I only make a sugestion to take out the comments , therefore we wont be rediculed by the world of our ignorance. I am sorry if I offended you, but is not directed at you. Thank you for your time.

"why don't you have pocianiss she was buried in london and she was a signer of
the declaration of independence" [I've heard of revisionist history, but this is ridiculous!]

"I was very disappointed that you are not the Mike Reed, and by that I mean frank off of eastenders, you're not even eighties DJ mike reed, you are blocking the domain names of some of this countries finest How is it I can find a website dedicated to a nobody with a penchant for grave fiddling and bumming dead presidents but can't find one for one of our greatest character actors, I BET YOU CAN'T EVEN PINCH THE BRIDGE OF YOUR NOSE!

"I would suggest that you bald, age to about 60 and buy a hat and some tobacco coloured glasses or terminate your web site to prevent any further disappointment to us 'reedophiles'." [Well, since the actor who plays Frank on Eastenders spells his last name "Reid," and since he does already have his own site under that name, I don't think I'm going to be purchasing those glasses any time soon. This guy must be one dedicated fan, huh?.]

"Mike:
"Why you bothered to publish your site is beyond me. There are many dead links and considering the derth of information regarding most of the European royalty it is not even informative. Nonetheless this site may impress culturally challenged Americans (your probable target audience). I just wonder whether you really visited the royal vault under St.Stephen's in Vienna....you should have at least 17 entries considering who happen to be buried there.

"Not impressed at all but you have as much right as me to publish whatever you want."

"your web site s***! all i was trying to find was walt disney facts! clean up! ***!"

Dear Mike Reed:

"I was delighted to find your web page entry on Prospect Hill Cemetery in Washington, DC. I was even more delighted to discover that the caretaker kicked you out on your a**. That's what my family, and many other descendants of the folks interred at the "old German Lutheran Cemetery," pay him for. Prospect Hill is a private cemetery, as is clearly marked on the sign at the entry gate....

"Convince me of your sincerity, and I would consider making you an "invited guest" at the cemetery because I find your web pages interesting and sincere in the pursuit of documenting your stated (and generally harmless) hobbies."

- Diane

"I guess it was naive of me to think that a web site "Ottawa Avenue Cemetery" would have a listing of the people buried in the Ottawa Avenue Cemetery in Ottawa, Illinois!!"

"This is pretty sick, dude. And there’s a picture of you in Pisa. That’s the same continent as me. I’d rather you didn’t come here again. Sorry to be mean about this but, should I ever become famous, I don’t want you taking photos of me for your website."

I would estimate that, of the thousand or more e-mails I have received, perhaps 40 or 50 have been negative. And most of those I just chuckle at and let go. However, a few times, I have allowed my "inner imp" to come out and decided to have some fun with those who have been unduly critical. Here is an e-mail I received from a guy named Gregg along with my response to him. If you want to absorb the full content of the e-mail's references, first check my notes on the graves of Laurence Olivier, Laurel and Hardy, and Dean Martin:

"if you don't know these people or cannot appreciate their genius........Lawrence Oliver is universally acknowleged as the 20th centuries greatest shakespearean actor. Gibson is a hack, and an antisemetic hack at that. If you can't appreciate the subjects of the graves you photograph....the stooges, laurel and hardy,etc.....why waste your time and mine. I think a talent like dean martin deserves better than ...boring california grave

- Gregg T. (The same thing we do everynight Pinky.....Try to take over the World!!!)

*Note: The phrase at the end was his e-mail "signature." For those who may, sadly, not be familiar with the phrase, it is a line from a brilliant cartoon called Pinky and the Brain. Now, for my reply to Gregg. For some reason, he never responded back....

I want to thank you for writing to me. I've had a rough couple weeks, and your e-mail humored me when it arrived, as well as again this evening as I re-read it.

Now, normally I would assume you are a lonely old man with no life and just dismiss your criticisms, but at least you redeemed yourself a bit by showing that you have good taste in animated art. So, are you pondering what I'm pondering? Good, let's examine your e-mail in detail.

Overlooking the basic spelling and grammar errors (20th century's, not centuries; anti-Semitic, not antisemetic..."Semitic" coming from "Shem," the son of Noah through whom the Jewish people descended; Laurence, not Lawrence...can't you appreciate his genius enough to spell his name correctly? Big fan, I guess...ok, maybe I'm not really overlooking those errors), there are also some simple factual errors.

Laurence (with a "u") Olivier is not universally acknowledged as the 20th century's ("ies" would indicate more than one 20th century, plus it would still need an apostrophe at the end as it is possessive) greatest Shakespearean actor. For one, I don’t agree, so that ruins the whole “universally” thing. But, I am not alone. Though not necessarily a scientific poll, the link here at About.com at least shows a less-than-universal acknowledgement of Olivier’s supremacy. I do not question his ability, but perhaps rather than assuming your viewpoint to be accepted by all, you might find it helpful to do as I try to do, just state your opinion and respect others’ opinions. Besides, my site is simply a self-acknowledged record of my own hobby, never making claims to be unbiased nor encyclopedic.

By the way, I do have some knowledge on the subject of Shakespeare, having studied his writings extensively both in my personal life and during my educational training (thanks to my English-teacher mother who instilled in me a love for great literature). I own very few DVDs myself, but those I do own are primarily every Shakespeare adaptation I can find. Perhaps I have an over-fondness for Gibson’s Hamlet because of the timing of my seeing it for the first time (just as I was learning to appreciate Shakespeare’s genius), but I do believe I am not beyond the scope of possibility to say that Branaugh has surpassed Olivier’s talents. Again, I acknowledge this as my opinion, but it is based upon some level of familiarity with and love for Shakespeare, so it’s not just ramblings based on limited brain capacity.

And, this brings me to my next critique. You may have noticed that my site includes over 1,000 graves on it. Somehow, I find it difficult to be too hard on myself concerning the fact that I do not have detailed knowledge of every one of those 1,000-plus people. Obviously, since I have my own personal interests, those areas will likely have greater worthwhile information than categories for which I have less interest. I will readily admit that I have much more knowledge of political figures than entertainment figures. This simply reflects my interests. I do try to do research and improve the quality of information on my site when possible, but since I just do this as a hobby for fun (nearly as fun as replying to ill-reasoned e-mail feedback) I do not always have the time to make each grave of equal thoroughness and detail. Consequently, I sometimes put in simple filler information reflecting my thoughts at the moment, with the intention of eventually improving the pages when I have the time and motivation to do so (and Dean Martin’s grave is boring).

Finally, I am loathe to accept responsibility for any wasted time on your part, since to the best of my knowledge, I never required your visit to my site nor enforced continued browsing once you got there. Any wasted time there, I am afraid, was your choice and responsibility. However, I am glad to know that, if you have read the entirety of this e-mail, perhaps I can claim responsibility for wasting a few minutes of your time this evening.

And even more finally, don’t forget to smile! I am as I type this....just having some fun with you while hoping to stimulate your thoughts on these items.

The following is one of my favorite e-mail exchanges, with a person named Maryanne. I attempted to be gracious at first, but this lady became FAR too entertaining, and I couldn't resist having some fun with my second reply (fortunately, this resulted in another entertaining response from her). Her comments are in the yellow text and my replies are in green. As with all of the comments on here, I have not edited her spelling, grammar, or word choice in any way, except to remove expletives. Honest! I'm not creative enough to come up with this type of stuff! One note to put this in context, this e-mail exchange took place almost a year before the death of the great civil rights activist Rosa Parks. That is significant in the exchange below:

"I think it's great. However, don't you think we get enough of the politicians above ground without digging all that up again? Pet cemetaries would be more interesting. Not knocking you, just my opinion. I'm sure there are alot of people like you who like to dish dirt."

- Maryanne [sent December 30, 2004]

"OK, thanks, I think. Actually, I love history, so I find the political graves fascinating. It is interesting to see people who once were considered national and world leaders, yet now are forgotten in some obscure little cemetery. Or others, who are entombed in massive monuments and visited by thousands. Not too many pet cemeteries that have tombs as cool as Abraham Lincoln's! ;-) "

-Mike [sent January 5, 2005]

"Yet how did they ride into battle, on their knees. NO, it was probabally an animal that they needed to get there. Being used again like the slaves. Animals. Obeying because they thought you loved them, but no, you NEEDED THEM. If they only knew what is was all about P.S. I think Abe should have really looked at it in a humanistist way, and guess what - the Irish were treated worse than the blacks. I think we got 2 cents to their nickel? If you love history soo much - I think with a name like Reed, it is easy to side with the blacks, but try looking up the Irish background.. Abe sucked. Just like the forgotten horeses that rode this idiots into battle thinking it was for love, but yet....if you know history they are as forgotten as the non-euros. How old are you mike? 9 ,,, and tell me what has anyone done for the sexes? There will be a black male or even a animal president before a woman... so honey you are barking up the wrong tree, just l like the dog you are...don't get me wrong - dogs make nice pets. Oh yeah, wasn't it ROSA PARKS a black WOMAN who was the first to stand up for equal rights, and guess what she was doing it for the sexes, not colors, hey where is her grave. She made a bigger difference. Guess what people like you....well like the old Indian saying...you know the ones whose lives don't count because of big mounments for a******* like Lincoln , well here's and Indian saying, you know the land we took away, here's how they feel about animals, The Indian legend....when a human dies there is a bridge he must cross to enter into heaven..At the head of that bridge waits every ANIMAL he ENCOUNTERED during his lifetime. The animals, decide which humans may cross the bridge...and which are turned away.....If I were you I'd find a pet cemetary and start praying."

Love and Kisses -

my a**

-Maryanne [sent January 6, 2005]

Dear Maryanne,

"For several days now, I have been trying to decide if you are insane or just hoping to be featured on the Feedback section of my website. I thought I gave a nice, respectful reply to your initial e-mail, and you come back with this wild ranting. For one thing, it will be a lot easier for you to claim this moral high ground for which you grasp if you can get basic details correct. For instance, to imply that I am somehow racist or sexist because I have not visited Rosa Parks’ grave would be more effective if she were dead, which she is not. As for the rest of the nearly-incoherent e-mail, I would suggest therapy to help you deal with anger management. For me, it made my day, I had a good laugh over your silliness."

Sincerely,

Michael Reed [sent January 13, 2005]

"Read you idiot, never mentioned Rosa was dead, Hey check out the cute little crosses in our war cemetaries, I see no mouments, except for the a******* who start this serial killing, and yet have never fougt a front line.. He deserved the bullit in his head. But hey what a great monument....I lost a brother in Viet Nam....how about you you a** kissing protected self proclaimed historian. I think the only thing you lost was your virginity, but then again if I remember correctly...I doubt it....It took you about a month or so to respond, was it hard reading, or did Rosa Parks not make your history books, and you had to do some real research. Insane - yes - people like you drive me nuts. Oh and you thinking I would want to be on your website is absurd...I wouldn't even know where to go now to find it, that's how much thought I have put into this.....You need to get a life.. Michael Reed...I saw that in my inbox and thought who the f***, another bulk mail gone astray, but no, I do vaguely remember you.. so dissappear. Thanks.."

-Maryanne [sent January 14, 2005]